Stop Masturbating for Men - The Benefits of Controlling Yourself

By Dr. Jeff Ferrara

Updated on August 16, 2018

guy masturbating too much in bed

Is there any benefit to abstaining from masturbation?

How much is too much?

Is it possible that masturbating too much might actually be bad for me?

In this blog article, we answer all these questions and see how you can benefit from holding back a little on that thing you learned to do at 12 years old.

Quality over Quantity and the Concept of Diminishing Returns

Most people can relate to quality over quantity.

This saying is a fundamental truth and almost every aspect of our lives.

Masturbation is no different.

Quality over quantity also relates to the economics concept of diminishing returns.

The typical example for diminishing returns that they give in schools is the chocolate bar example.

Let's take a chocolate bar that costs $1.

The first time you buy that chocolate bar and eat it, the benefits in terms of happiness and satisfaction are at its highest.

But then, what happens when you buy another $1 chocolate bar immediately after you eat the first one?

After you eat that second chocolate bar right after the first one, you don't feel as satisfied as compared to the first one.

Then, repeat that process of buying and eating the chocolate bar immediately after the one before.

Little by little (or for some people pretty quickly) you get sick and tired of the chocolate bar.

This is the concept of diminishing returns.

graph illustrating the concept of diminishing returns

The same thing goes for constantly masturbating.

You simply need to give sufficient time between each masturbation session to avoid having diminishing returns.

However, everybody is different.

For some people this could be a day. For other people, a day is actually still not enough downtime.

For another group of people, they're actually better off if they wait three to five days between masturbation sessions.

Regardless of what the time period is, for each individual, the idea is to abstain in order to prevent diminishing returns. We will see later on in the article what kind of benefits diminishing returns can provide in the context of abstaining from masturbation.

Masturbation doesn't really provide you anything in the long run

Think about it.

When you masturbate, it only provides temporary pleasure.

But what does it do for your well being in the long run? Not much.

unhappy, frustrated man getting nowhere

Sure, the sensation is awesome, but it's fleeting.

In terms of productivity, true sexual satisfaction and happiness, it doesn't really provide any of those things.

No, we're not 100% against masturbation - that is, we actually think it's a good, natural thing to do once in awhile.

However, some people actually feel that they need to squeeze one out just to get through the rest of the day.

Now that's when the problems start to kick in.

Sometimes, these guys are under the false pretense that masturbating will relax them and cure their stress, so they start to think that it's a good cure for the negative things in their lives.

Then, they end up doing it once a day, then that once a day grows into twice a day, and at that point, it's pretty much game over.

Again, you need to establish some self-control and don't make it into a habit.

man with a bad gambling habit

And more importantly, don't warp your mind into thinking that it will provide you a lot of beneficial returns.

Your sex drive will increase immensely

Believe it or not, your sex drive will actually go up as a result not masturbating too often.

man and woman with increased sex drive

Your body will naturally recharge and the anticipation leading up to a sexual encounter will be at its maximum.

This is the perfect time to unleash.

For some guys, this might actually come across as scary because they don't want to finish too early and leave their partner unsatisfied for the rest of the night. However, if you sufficiently train yourself with premature ejaculation prevention techniques like edging, then this shouldn't be a problem at all.

In addition to having a stronger sex drive, you will also come across to your partner as having more energy and passion in bed.

For some women, passion is a lot more important for their sexual experience.

So, you'll be doing them a big favor.

Remember, it's not all about just having a big penis. Girls love other things about love making, especially the passion aspect.

Since some women aren't as sexually hungry as other women, you definitely want to be ready with your sex drive when that special time comes.

You will be more productive

Believe it or not, you will be more productive.

a productive business man getting lots of things done

When you take out unnecessary tasks from your daily schedule, this frees up both physical and mental time to getting things done.

When you masturbate regularly, you don't really know it, but subconsciously, you're anticipating that next masturbation session.

This tends to interfere with your regular lifestyle.

The goal here is to get your masturbation sessions to happen much more naturally and spontaneously.

Think of it this way: let's say you put in a hard days work, not distracted, and legitimately get a lot of things done.

Then, you come home, have a nice meal, and squeeze one out, all without the burden of daily stress in the back of your mind.

When you're done you don't have a second thought about it.

That's the way it should be - it's much better for your mental well-being.

See, the secret to being productive is to only take one thing on at a time.

We as humans aren't built for multitasking. Multitasking becomes a complete mess.

So when we have so much crap on our minds, either we don't get things done efficiently or we end up crashing.

Any anxiety or stress that is caused by unhealthy and excessive masturbation doesn't help this equation.

Your self esteem will increase in the short term and long term

This one I can speak on personal experience.

I'm sure a lot of other guys can testify as well.

Don't you feel kind of guilty after you squeeze one off?

Especially when it's in your dark room, alone?

man guilty of masturbating too much

Now, imagine doing this over and over multiple times all week.

It simply is not good for your self-esteem.

There was a time when I would masturbate at least once a day.

It was a fairly dark, depressing time my life (don't worry, my life is much better now!).

But this story also relates to the concept of diminishing returns that I mentioned earlier.

Every time I masturbated, it felt good for a couple seconds, but the downtime that immediately followed really negatively affected how I felt.

So I made the conscious decision to hold off on masturbating by limiting myself to only once a week.

The results were fantastic.

Because my sexual life wasn't preoccupied with sitting in front of a computer, moving my hand in a furious motion, I made a conscious effort to try and hit on girls whether there were online (online dating sites/apps) or in real life.

This, in turn did wonders for my self esteem.

I feel so much better interacting with real women rather than staring at the digital ones that never truly exist in my life.

And what do you know, I actually ended up sleeping with a couple of these women.

meeting women in a coffee shop

It was a truly satisfying result for a healthier life investment.

I actually valued myself more and my self-esteem improved as a result.

I was able to generate a positive, real-life experience rather than a throw-away, shallow, in-the-dark session that didn't provide any true enrichment.

It will reduce guilt and depression

How does it reduce these two things?

It gives you the feeling of control over your life again.

See, there's a type of emasculation that comes with uncontrollable masturbation.

It feels as if you are a slave to the habit.

Some guys will masturbate to reduce their current stress levels.

depressed young man

Unfortunately, the problem is that the looming, real-life problems like bills, relationships, and work that are the sole cause of the stress are still there after orgasm.

In other words, masturbation will not help to reduce life's stressful challenges but instead getting motivated and taking action to solve these real life problems will.

If you have trouble solving life's problems, just take it one at a time. If you have two-problems, completely forget about one and focus on the easiest one.

Get some momentum. Feel the reward that comes with eliminating something troublesome from your life.

Then, use that momentum to tackle the next problem.

Chunking: chop the problem into smaller easier tasks.

Masturbation should not be an important apart of this process.

You will appreciate women and sex more

man chasing a woman because he has a higher sex drive

Some guys have reported to think more romantically and more passionately about their relationships.

Additionally, if you are single and you are going to hit the bars with the intent of hitting on women, not masturbating will definitely increase your social skills that night.

See, there's something about masturbating that just kills all that sexual momentum which it isn't too good for trying to hit up a conversation with real women.

We humans are creatures of thousands of years of evolution. We still react strongly to our fears, desires and needs - all in order to survive.

When there's no desire to meet women - because you satisfied yourself with your hand - you simply won't make the effort to go out and seek women!

Again, this reiterates the point that masturbation is a sex-drive killer.

Additionally, this concept is not exclusive to sex-drive, you could simply lose motivation, and just fall asleep after masturbating - reiterating our point that it can kill your productivity though complacency.

If you absolutely must masturbate, stop using pornography

Or if you can't stop using pornography 100%, kill the mindset that you need it to masturbate.

See, sex and masturbation is both a mental and physical thing.

Of course there's the obvious physical stimulation that happens during masturbation, as well as during sex.

But one thing will people don't realize is the mental aspect of it.

This mental aspect is just as strong (sometimes even stronger), but it is just as important as the physical aspect to sexual pleasure.

Now, when you introduce pornography into the equation, the >mental aspect of the sexual experience gets completely screwed up.

Your mind gets used to the extreme stimulation - much of it is not realistic. Ultimately, this affects your ability to get and maintain an erection as well as achieve a satisfying orgasm.

This is because your sexual pleasure expectations become rewired and screwed-up.

That's why, we here on the PhalloGauge team recommend using your mind and imagination and think about someone real in your life that will bring you to orgasm.

man using his imagination when masturbating

The difference between that and pornography is astronomical.

See, the orgasm without pornography comes from within and is much more satisfying and empowering.

The orgasm that comes from pornography is an unnatural reaction to an unhealthy drug addiction.

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